Collaborative Divorce! Huh! Good God Y’all! Who Is It Good For?
No one wants a divorce. Even spouses that make the decision to initiate a separation or divorce don’t want to be in a place where that looks like their best option.
Despite everyone’s best efforts, divorces still happen. Maybe someday we can change that. But, until we do, there have to be reasonable and humane ways to go about it.
That’s what Collaborative Divorce (“CD”) is for. It is for people who want to divorce in a reasonable and humane way.
CD is an alternative dispute resolution process, which means that it is an alternative to the courthouse. It is a process for reaching mutual decisions about your children, your house, your retirement accounts, and your life in the future after divorce, instead of having the government make those decisions for you.
CD is designed to be a joint problem solving process, not an argument or battle of wills. It is a process that looks forward to “what are we going to do moving forward” instead of “what happened in the past”.
CD revolves around open sharing of information, attorneys that commit to focusing their efforts on staying out of court, and a negotiation that doesn’t feel like a war of attrition. The focus is on the clients and their needs, not a win-loss record for the attorneys.
If litigation is gas on a fire, think of CD as a fire extinguisher.
The goal of CD is to help families resolve their legal conflict while protecting their children, their finances and their relationship as much as possible.
That is not to say that CD is rainbows and unicorns. Divorce naturally involves difficult emotions such as anger, resentment, hurt, betrayal, fear and anxiety. The goal is not to act like these emotions are not happening. But, instead the goal is to create an environment where these emotions can be acknowledged so that they do not sabotage the negotiation and the future well being of family members.
Divorce is hard, but it doesn’t have to be any harder than necessary. Collaborative Divorce is a great way to do a difficult thing well. Contact an experienced CD attorney to find out more.
About the author: Randolph (Tré) Morgan III is Board Certified Family Law Specialist and an experienced North Carolina family law attorney accepting cases in the Greater Triangle area. He focuses his practice in separation, divorce, child custody, alimony, child support, equitable distribution, property division, alienation of affection, criminal conversation, parentage, guardianship and other family related matters in the collaborative process, mediation and other non-litigation processes. Website: Learn more here